isn't it funny how this works?

some days you can be sweet. like, really sweet. you can be so sweet that i can just either eat you all up/smother you with sweetness back or just be totally happy. and some other days you are just the most charming, nicest all-smiles boy in the whole world. you are also skilled to be the most loving person, making me really happy, all lovey-dovey and all sweet, spices and everything nice.


and then, some other days, you make me just want to rip someone's head off.

or tear something up. beat something/someone until they're completely unrecognisable. especially when you don't know how your words/lack thereof will make me feel, will affect me. at times when you dont seem like you dont give a shit. maybe you say 'oh, you know i always care,' bla bla bla, WELL AT TIMES IT DOESNT SEEM THAT WAY OKAY. there are times when the 'signs' your giving out doesnt spell out i care for you at all. so how am i supposed to know?


i am not going to text/call/see/whatever you first, as of today. see what you would do. see if you would even notice. i hope you'll have fun playing at the NETCAFE. dont know why guys are so freaking drawn to this place. if it was a strip club, yes, i get the reason. but that shit. those netcafe owners must get a lot of profits from basically all the 14-20 year old guys in this whole freaking world. i go in that place sometimes, for you, and i dont complain, i try to enjoy it and even find some sort of fun from it. so why cant you do the same when we go to 'girl' shops? i dont grumble and act annoyed and pissed and bored whenever we go to some appliance store or electronics or some shit. even if your not enjoying it why dont you let me have the fun sometimes ???


its not a nice feeling, by the way, wanting to rip something to shreds/puching the hell out of something/being plain pissed off and you know it, but your not doing anything about it - right in the middle of the night. 12.42 and i cant sleep because of this annoying angry feeling. i was actually all nicely tucked up in bed, but my thoughts just kept going over these angry stuff and i got out again, took out the laptop and attacked the keyboard with these ANGRY WORDS. maybe i should turn this around and see how you would react if i did some things you did. SOME DAYS HUH.